I called my friend just now. It's been almost a month since I last met her. We talk like we haven't meet for a year. We talked about memories just now. Memories in school. Those happy moments, those happy times. She lost someone that she love, too. We used to spent time together; 4 people, me, her, and our boyfriends. My apologize, our ex boyfriends. We really miss those moments where we both sat next to them, laughing, teasing and precious the moments. How we both missed them.
Its funny how we cried just now. We both really miss our special ones. I told her " ... Its sad because that moment, I still could see the love shining through his eyes, but then since last month, I didn't see the 'love' anymore. ". Its really really sad when those moments hit our mind. We cried cause we miss them, those person who doesn't even think of us anymore. We cried cause we are still hoping, that soon they will come back. We cried cause we still believe they are the one for us. We cried cause we know we're stupid for still believing. We cried . . . cause we haven't cry for a long time. Cause we knew, if we cry, there will be no one who can wipe our tears from our cheek and give us a hug and promise us that everything will get back to normal. Like they used to do, back then when we're still together.
Its raining outside. Its really heavy. I feel like going out. Can I drive to our fav park? Please? Hm. I miss having him in my life, saying " .. Baby, hujan kan? Jangan keluar okay? I tak bagi " Well at least I know he'd care for me. But now, there's no more. Lol. Even so I miss him, I know I can't force him. I can't even call him. I can't even text him . .
I'm planning to treat my family for dinner next week, since I'll get my salary for this month within this few days. I told him before we broke up, I want him to join my family and dinner with us. And I can't remember what his answer is, whether OK or NO. but however, even though he's not a part of my life anymore, I would still be glad if he could join us. But then how am I going to invite him? I can't contact him. And he already told me he wont come home next week. So I should just forget my intention about this plan, I think. But still, I would be glad if next week, he'll knock my door, and I open the door, and there he is, smiling and look at me. I would still be glad if he could join us next week. I hope, oh dear, I hope. Hopeless wish.
I saw this couple just now, the guy is more shorter than the girl. He holds her hand, they look happy. Weird. It feels weird. Weird because I used to feel that feelings. I used to be hold by someone that I love. I look at them, and then they suddenly smile at me. Weird. Seriously its weird. I smile back to them, fake smile. Hopeless, wishless, feelingless.
He came to my place just now, I mean my friend, Wafi. He came and he said ' .. Ohh, awat duduk sini plak? Korang tak suke Wafi ek? .. " Because we sat at different places today. Me, and my friends. And I said ' .. No, Jay suruh kitorang duduk sini. Tmrw kitorang dok sane ye abang Wafiiiiii? ". Heh, I love to call him ABANG. Cause he will make faces. Lol. And there he was, Fareez, he came to my place, stop behind my back, and I look to my pc, I could see his reflection. And after a few sec, he went away. I don't know what the motif of him standing behind my back. Oh crap, I don't give a damn. I saw this one guy, kept looking at me. When I look at him, he's still looking at me. So I decide to change my view. Sigh. Annoying.
Ahh, my throat and my head is killing me. Sumpah sakit :( Asal ah? It hurts. I can't seems to eat anything, and my head is spinning. I took lots of panadols today. Lol. What the heck, no one cares.
When I'm smiling, when I'm laughing, when I'm happy, when I be strong, when I'm sick, he's still in my mind. How talkative I can be, while I'm talking, he's in my mind. I missed the feelings to be worried by someone when I get sick. I missed the feelings to sleep with secured knowing that tomorrow, they'll be there. Weird how a guy, a simple guy, can make me fall and into him so much. " Thanks for making me love you so much, and thanks for leaving me and make me suffering alone, without you in my life. Whatever happens, you're still the best thing that I ever had. I still don't blame you for doing this to me. You're not being yourself now. You can't think well. I know someday you will find your old self back, and fix this thing and make it better. I still believe and hold on to something, and I'll stick to it forever. Perhaps it wont let me down.I love you. =") "
-Nobody
Suddenly I feel lonely. . Suddenly I feel like hugging his pillow. But I know I can't. How I wish if he knows that the song in my blog is for him.
Its funny how we cried just now. We both really miss our special ones. I told her " ... Its sad because that moment, I still could see the love shining through his eyes, but then since last month, I didn't see the 'love' anymore. ". Its really really sad when those moments hit our mind. We cried cause we miss them, those person who doesn't even think of us anymore. We cried cause we are still hoping, that soon they will come back. We cried cause we still believe they are the one for us. We cried cause we know we're stupid for still believing. We cried . . . cause we haven't cry for a long time. Cause we knew, if we cry, there will be no one who can wipe our tears from our cheek and give us a hug and promise us that everything will get back to normal. Like they used to do, back then when we're still together.
Its raining outside. Its really heavy. I feel like going out. Can I drive to our fav park? Please? Hm. I miss having him in my life, saying " .. Baby, hujan kan? Jangan keluar okay? I tak bagi " Well at least I know he'd care for me. But now, there's no more. Lol. Even so I miss him, I know I can't force him. I can't even call him. I can't even text him . .
I'm planning to treat my family for dinner next week, since I'll get my salary for this month within this few days. I told him before we broke up, I want him to join my family and dinner with us. And I can't remember what his answer is, whether OK or NO. but however, even though he's not a part of my life anymore, I would still be glad if he could join us. But then how am I going to invite him? I can't contact him. And he already told me he wont come home next week. So I should just forget my intention about this plan, I think. But still, I would be glad if next week, he'll knock my door, and I open the door, and there he is, smiling and look at me. I would still be glad if he could join us next week. I hope, oh dear, I hope. Hopeless wish.
I saw this couple just now, the guy is more shorter than the girl. He holds her hand, they look happy. Weird. It feels weird. Weird because I used to feel that feelings. I used to be hold by someone that I love. I look at them, and then they suddenly smile at me. Weird. Seriously its weird. I smile back to them, fake smile. Hopeless, wishless, feelingless.
He came to my place just now, I mean my friend, Wafi. He came and he said ' .. Ohh, awat duduk sini plak? Korang tak suke Wafi ek? .. " Because we sat at different places today. Me, and my friends. And I said ' .. No, Jay suruh kitorang duduk sini. Tmrw kitorang dok sane ye abang Wafiiiiii? ". Heh, I love to call him ABANG. Cause he will make faces. Lol. And there he was, Fareez, he came to my place, stop behind my back, and I look to my pc, I could see his reflection. And after a few sec, he went away. I don't know what the motif of him standing behind my back. Oh crap, I don't give a damn. I saw this one guy, kept looking at me. When I look at him, he's still looking at me. So I decide to change my view. Sigh. Annoying.
Ahh, my throat and my head is killing me. Sumpah sakit :( Asal ah? It hurts. I can't seems to eat anything, and my head is spinning. I took lots of panadols today. Lol. What the heck, no one cares.
When I'm smiling, when I'm laughing, when I'm happy, when I be strong, when I'm sick, he's still in my mind. How talkative I can be, while I'm talking, he's in my mind. I missed the feelings to be worried by someone when I get sick. I missed the feelings to sleep with secured knowing that tomorrow, they'll be there. Weird how a guy, a simple guy, can make me fall and into him so much. " Thanks for making me love you so much, and thanks for leaving me and make me suffering alone, without you in my life. Whatever happens, you're still the best thing that I ever had. I still don't blame you for doing this to me. You're not being yourself now. You can't think well. I know someday you will find your old self back, and fix this thing and make it better. I still believe and hold on to something, and I'll stick to it forever. Perhaps it wont let me down.
-Nobody
Suddenly I feel lonely. . Suddenly I feel like hugging his pillow. But I know I can't. How I wish if he knows that the song in my blog is for him.
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